Word to the Absurd VI: The Absurdity Continues

Time for another edition of the strange things we say to each other in our house. As always, these are actual conversations.

Shawna: “Stop making me yell so much!”
Xander: “That’s YOUR choice, Mommy.”
(It’s always tricky when they start using your own wisdom against you.)

Shawna: “Oscar, say sorry.”
Oscar: “The sorry in my belly feels like it’s out of batteries.”

Xander: “Why can’t I play paintball until I’m older?”
Me: “Because getting shot with a paintball hurts. It can leave a welt.”
Xander: “What’s a welt?”
Me: “A big red mark on your skin.”
Xander: “Oh. But that’s just usual around this house.”

Shawna: “Please don’t do that. Mommy doesn’t want to go to the Emergency Room today.”

Oscar: “Some people live on the bottom of the world. But they don’t fall off because we have gravity. I’m very thankful for gravity, because it keeps us from falling off the earth into space.”

Oscar: “Mmm, these carrots make my ears feel so warm.”
Me: “You’re not supposed to put them in your ears.”
Oscar: “But it feels so nice!”

Xander: “Why did the Mom let her kids play in the car?”
Me: “Why?”
Xander: “Because it was a Toy-ota!”

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2 responses to “Word to the Absurd VI: The Absurdity Continues

  1. These are great! I just discovered you guys this morning after reading your article in the paper. I am a fellow Nova Scotian with 4 kids (the oldest is now 8), and I am enjoying your observations that I can really relate to!

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